The Art of the Grift: Tariffs, Treason, and a Tale of Two Tyrannies

So, who the fuck actually knows if Donald J. Trump is a Russian asset at this point? Honestly, the man’s spent so long doing such a convincing impression of one that even if he isn’t, you’d be forgiven for assuming he is. A two-time (possibly three-time, if American democracy decides to really top itself) president of the United States, who makes Nixon look like a paragon of restraint. If Trump isn’t compromised, then he’s doing a stellar job of simulating it — all while cashing in like the rent’s due on every soul in America.

Let’s get one thing straight: Trump is a grifter. Not your everyday scammer with a burner phone and a dodgy PayPal link — no, he’s a once-in-a-generation fraud savant. A walking Ponzi scheme with hair like burnt insulation. From fake universities, to dodgy charity foundations that spent more on oil paintings of himself than actual charity, this man has a supernatural ability to sniff out every legal grey area and exploit it like it owes him money. And don’t forget the small matter of six bankruptcies. Only in America can you fail upwards so spectacularly that you land in the Oval Office with gold-plated toilet seats.

Now, let’s talk tariffs — Trump’s favourite economic sledgehammer. During his first term, he slapped China with tariffs like he was settling an old grudge. Billions in levies, a so-called trade war that mostly just ended up costing American farmers their livelihoods, and a lot of chest-thumping about “bringing jobs back.” Spoiler: the jobs did not come back. What did come was a surge in prices, market instability, and the kind of economic incoherence that makes a Wetherspoons menu look like a UN treaty.

But while China got the stick, Russia… well, Russia got a pass. Almost suspiciously so. It’s not that the U.S. didn’t have sanctions on Russia — they did, and still do, particularly after the invasion of Crimea and later, Ukraine. But Trump’s relationship with Russia was so weirdly deferential it was like watching someone flirt with their blackmailer. Remember that Helsinki summit? The one where Trump sided with Putin over his own intelligence agencies? Treason-adjacent at best, full-on puppet theatre at worst.

I’d love to give a credit to this, it’s from an AI YouTube video. Tell me in the comments if you know who did it, and I’ll amend.

So, here’s a hypothetical: China’s being tariffed to hell and back. Russia, not so much. What’s the betting that Russia starts buying up American goods tariff-free and selling them on to China at a nice little markup? Middleman economics, Moscow-style. Or perhaps the two countries strike a backroom deal — the kind autocracies love — and circumvent sanctions and tariffs altogether. After all, China and Russia have been cosying up in recent years like two mafia families planning a turf war over the West.

As above.

Logistically, it’s not as far-fetched as it sounds. Russia’s already become a key energy supplier to China, particularly since Western sanctions over Ukraine turned the Kremlin into an economic pariah. Trade between the two nations hit record highs in 2023, with over $240 billion exchanged. That’s not a casual transaction — that’s a bromance built on barrels of oil, weapons tech, and a shared hatred of Western hypocrisy.

Meanwhile, U.S. oversight under Trump was about as thorough as a wet paper towel trying to stop a flood. If it wasn’t nailed down, it was deregulated. If it was regulated, it got sued. So the idea of two authoritarian regimes quietly bypassing tariffs and sanctions while Trump looked the other way, either wilfully or out of sheer incompetence, seems less like a conspiracy theory and more like Tuesday.

Will this bollocks continue? Short answer: probably. We can certainly expect more of the same: anti-China rhetoric with zero strategy, a blind spot the size of Siberia when it comes to Russia, and plenty of dodgy deals that conveniently benefit the people he claims to be “getting tough” on.

The real tragedy? Some of the American public might fall for it again. Because when the grift is good, and the patriotism is loud enough, no one notices the bloke behind the curtain flogging the country one contract at a time. Mind you, each week that passes that patriotism is toning itself right down.

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